News archive

*AUS* thought we had gotten off lightly when the ladder closed, ending the season on a high after totally sodomising our previous opponent who simply didn't have enough members to balance out the daisy chain. Admittedly, we were resting on our laurels when TOG Cobra decided to challenge us for the hotly contested 30th position on the ladder. Were we about to give it up to a bunch of geriatric RSL regulars? Hell yes! The enthusiasm emanating from the *AUS* members was so vibrant that I almost got sunburnt reading our forums with my fair skin and all. So I organised 2 training sessions prior to the match and a total of 5 people attended.

Round 1: As the allies we managed to let their barrage of infantry and tanks through the Arnhem bridge. This wasn't the actual plan, I think I remember specifically saying don't let them through and something about mines, and those expack things too but we ballsed it up. The TOG rash spread to Arnhem and the skirmish lasted for the entire round. It seemed as though TOG always had some sort of foothold and it was royally shitting us blokes at the Arnhem bridge off. The sneaky buggers knew all the good hiding spots where they could take a quick nap and if we dared disturb them they'd kill us. We managed to isolate TOG at Arnhem and Arnhem Bridge with our main infantry team, which was lucky for us, we won the round 83-0.

Round 2: As the krauts my instructions this time were "get in whatever vehicle you can and make a beeline for Arnhem Bridge". Simple enough. So all 12 of us head over to Arnhem bridge. I was 3rd in the beeline in a Tiger and in front of me were the other Tiger and one of our Tanks parallel to the Tiger. They stopped at the Arnhem Bridge bunker after spotting some mines. I'm saying to them "guys get out of the frigging way there are several thousand fellow Nazis behind you trying to clear a path to liberate Holland". But noooo they don't move and instead decide to try and remove the landmines with a spanner. Meanwhile the B17 had just gotten airborne and was headed straight for Arnhem Bridge. I don't know how many of our crew were taken out by that bombing run but my guesstimate would be, say... all of us? A poorly orchestrated start led to a well orchestrated defeat by TOG. 132-0, what an absolute flogging!

Round 3: This time the yanks were a little wiser to TOG's little tricks. We knew all their hiding spots and there was no fooling us. To make up for the lack of mines layed at Arnhem Bridge in the 1st round, it seemed as though everyone now fancied themselves as engineers and we set up the hugest minefield I've ever seen. This didn't help one iota when they sent their infantry across. Even though we knew their tricks it seemed like a repeat of round 1 except for the fact that we took a few more of their tanks out and we knew where to find their sleepy campers. We were victorius 102-0.

Round 4: Needing to lose by less than 53 to win, the *AUS* nazis huddled together and decided that we'd attempt something completely arsey. We decided to come to peace with the bridge and get to Church ASAP to confess our sins. TOG were kind enough to leave us a tank there which, admittedly, we took unholy advantage of. With their attention diverted we then managed to take control of both the Bridges. Not for long though as the supreme champions of napping managed to find their hidey holes once again, the best we could hope for was to keep most of the flags grey and that is what we did. What a memorable loss it was for us, 36-0.

Somehow we won 185-168. It came down to that last round and I attribute our miraculous win to an act of God. Yes, the Lord Jeebus Christ was truly with us, favouring our sparkly clean souls over their sinful and wretched old hides. That'll learn you for not going to Church. Well done *AUS*, bad luck for TOG. That leaves us at 6 wins nad 5 losses for the GA season and 8-10 all up. Not a bad effort and recovery.

Write-up by hawkeye*AUS* as posted in our private forums:

After playing the match one can only think of the hell that a real soldier must go thought as they walk through the real Basrah.

The first round was a speedy one with nG taking us head on in what became a very jagged front line. It started with *AUS* getting off to a flying start as we rounded the first corner taking the C-130 crash site with the help of a few smoke grenades, only to find that we had let them slip away to capture the slurgepoint, thus leaving the members of team B without much hope of being reached in time.

Just as thoughts of a smooth round for us enterd our minds we heard the thundering roar of a BMP2 coming to kill what was left of us. As we demolished the members for team A, team C rocked up to ensure that the skirmish would stay alive with the round drawing to a near and every gun on the map firing.

*AUS* 0
nG 103

The next round saw the same fight erupt into one of the biggest simultaneous massacre for both sides. The opening skirmish didn't finsh till well over half the round had gone when nG outflanked us from the rear and then unleashed hell. For a large part of the second round the C-130 crash site was grey with both teams deadlocked for millimeters of ground.

*AUS* 0
nG 20

With the mops being dried from cleaning the blood off the walls and streets, it was sure thing that the cleaner would have a job for the next 2 years. This round was geared up for one hell of a fight with both teams finding form. Within the first 10 seconds there was at least 5 people dead. both teams tried and tried with no dice as the flag was grey for well over half the match. Once again nG outflanked *AUS* from the rear and then moved in what can only be described as perfect order.

*AUS* 0
nG 103

*AUS* had had enough by now making the move to form 1 team and 1 draft net which worked very well allowing *AUS* to hold all 3 flags for the first time in the match. but it just coudn't hold with them using the skill of their shotguns to push us back to yet another bloody battle for centremeters of ground.

*AUS* 0
nG 48